Posts by Baby Sister

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    Today is the most bizarre weather day I have seen in a long time. We have had thunderstorms, tornado watches, 1.75 in size hail just outside of town, possible two tornadoes just east of us, the temp has been around 60 with temps dropping back down into the 30's tommorow. We are also in a High wind advisory until 6 am Sunday morning, and a blowing snow advisory until the same time with 2-4 inches of snow expected by tomorrow morning. And that is just in my area, highways are already closed in the western part of the state into Denver.

    They always say if you don't like the weather in Kansas wait 15 mins. because it will change but holy cow this is freaky....I am staying home with my bbq takeout and movies until Monday morning yuk......

    Baby Sis

    :cowboy: :cowboy: :cowboy:

    She was Soooooooo Blonde..
    * She thought a quarterback was a refund.
    * She thought General Motors was in the army
    * She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
    * She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
    * At the bottom of an application where it says "Sign here:" she wrote "Sagittarius."


    She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
    * She took the ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
    * She sent a fax with a stamp on it.
    * Under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics."


    She was Sooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
    * She tripped over a cordless phone.
    * She spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said "Concentrate."
    * She told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK."
    * She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.


    She was Soooooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
    * She studied for a blood test.
    * She sold the car for gas money.
    * When she missed bus #44 she took bus #22 twice instead.
    * When she went to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left," she turned around and went home.


    She Was Sooooooooooooooooooooo Blonde...
    * When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
    * She thought if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
    * She thought that she could not use her AM radio in the evening.
    * She had a shirt that said "TGIF," which she thought stood for "This Goes In Front."


    AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE:


    She is sooooooooooooooooo Blonde...


    She thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.

    RED-NECK VALENTINE


    Collards is green


    My dog's name is Blue


    And I'm so lucky to have


    A sweet thang like you.



    Yore hair is like cornsilk


    A-flapping in the breeze


    Softer than Blue's


    And without all them fleas.



    You move like the bass,


    Which excite me in May.


    You ain't got no scales


    But I luv you anyway.



    Yo're as satisfy'n as okry


    Jist a-fry'n in the pan.


    Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"


    Right out of the can.



    You have som'a yore teeth,


    For which I am proud;


    I hold my head high


    When we're in a crowd.



    On special occasions,


    When you shave under yore arms,


    Well, I'm in hawg heaven,


    And awed by yore charms.



    Still them fellers at work,


    They all want to know,


    What I did to deserve


    Such a purdy, young doe.



    Like a good roll of duct tape


    Yo're there fer yore man,


    To patch up life's troubles


    And fix what you can.



    Yo're as cute as a junebug


    A-buzzin' overhead.


    You ain't mean like those far ants


    I found in my bed.



    Cut from the best cloth


    Like a plaid flannel shirt,


    You spark up my life


    More than a fresh load of dirt.



    When you hold me real tight


    Like a padded gunrack,


    My life is complete;


    Ain't nuttin' I lack.



    Yore complexion, it's perfection,


    Like the best vinyl sidin'.


    Despite all the years,


    Yore age, it keeps hidin'.



    Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie


    With a RC cold drank,


    We go together


    Like a skunk goes with stank.



    Some men, they buy chocolate


    For Valentine's Day;


    They git it at Wal-Mart,


    it's romantic that way.



    Some men git roses


    On that special day


    From the cooler at Kroger.


    "That's impressive," I say.



    Some men buy fine diamonds


    From a flea market booth.


    "Diamonds are forever,"


    They explain, suave and couth.



    But for this man, honey, these won't do.


    Cause yo're too special, you sweet thang you.


    I got you a gift, without taste nor odor,


    More useful than diamonds...


    IT'S A NEW TROLLIN' MOTOR!!