A Friendly Subject

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  • Baby Sister,


    I'm not sure what you intended to post, but I think it got lost . . . or something . . . because none of us can see it. Or were you just testing our powers of observation :wink_smile:?


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



    In the meantime, check this out -


    T H E Y A C H T




    65' custom-built motor yacht complete with staterooms,
    a state-of-the-art galley,

    G.P.S. system and radar for navigation,
    twin supercharged diesel engines, etc.



    $2.5 million




    Champagne, chocolate covered strawberries with cream,
    and music dockside
    for the excited 'soon to be owners' and a small group of friends.



    $500.00





    Two corporate representatives, crane,
    and rigging complete with faulty turnbuckle.



    $2,500/hour





    (Note the guy in the stern!)





    Watching your dreamboat nose dive into the harbor,
    accompanied by two corporate
    representatives
    just prior to 'inking' the final paperwork...





    PRICELESS!


  • I went with my older brother to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes. We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he kept watching a teenager sitting at the next table. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My brother kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find my brother staring every time.

    When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"

    Knowing my brother, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response; knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response, "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."

    De gustibus non est disputandum

  • stumpy

    good on your brother, glad that you swallowed quickly otherwise it could have been all over the place. he surely has a wicked sense of humour. had a good belly laugh with that one

    cheers smokey

    " its not all black and white, but different shades of grey"

  • baby sister it didnt come out again maybe some in the know will be able to help you to get it here

    cheers smokey

    " its not all black and white, but different shades of grey"

  • sorry guys, when I post and check back on this post the picture is here, then when I come back the next day it is gone.? I don't know what is going on...gremlins I guess.

    Sorry
    Baby Sis
    :cowboy::cowboy::cowboy:

    "Give me a man like Duke Wayne"...Marueen O'Hara

  • Here is something to get you in the mood for St. Valentines day.


    VALENTINES DAY



    Just in case you're stuck for what to write in your Valentines day
    card........These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking
    for a rhyme with the most romantic first line... but the least romantic
    second line.



    1. Thought that I could love no other


    That is until I met your brother.



    2. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.


    But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty
    and so is your head.



    3. Of loving beauty you float with grace If only you could hide your
    face


    4. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;


    This describes everything you are not


    5. I want to feel your sweet embrace


    But don't take that paper bag off of your face



    6. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes - Damn, I'm good at
    telling lies!



    7. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:


    Marrying you screwed up my life



    8. I see your face when I am dreaming.


    That's why I always wake up screaming



    9. My love, you take my breath away.


    What have you stepped in to smell this way?



    10. My feelings for you no words can tell, Except for maybe "go to
    hell"



    11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?


    Two parts vodka, one part lime.


    :agent:

    Regards
    Robbie

  • I'm sure our members who are not native English speakers might be particularly confused (or amused) by the following -


    An English Lesson (or not . . . )


    1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
    2) The farm was used to produce produce.
    3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
    4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
    5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
    6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
    7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present
    8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
    9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
    10) I did not object to the object.
    11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
    12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row
    13) They were too close to the door to close it.
    14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

    15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
    16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
    17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail
    18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
    19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
    20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?


    Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
    And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese, so one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
    If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?
    How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
    English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
    PS. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"


    You lovers of the English language might enjoy this.


    There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is "UP." it's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP? At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?
    We call UP our friends. And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver, we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car. At other times the little word has real special meaning. People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses. To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special. And this UP is confusing: A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP. We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night. We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP! To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions. If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more. When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP. When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP. When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP.

    One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP, for now my time is UP , so........... it is time to shut UP.....!


  • Hi Jim,Count me in the students of Chester's English language classroom.
    I never think the English language is crazy.
    A lot of examples of doing that you showed are also seen for Japanese.

    A difficult point is that the slang word and the new expression not found
    in the dictionary have occured in studying English everyday.

    Young people these days has a tendency to accept odd name, hasn't they?
    Nevaeh,Nahla, Emma-Lee, Com'ron, Thailah, Siimon, Jaykob,Lynkom?
    I must keep up with the times.
    Regards,
    H.sanada

    Sometimes kids ask me what a pro is. I just point to the Duke.
    ~Steve McQueen~